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Junie B. Jones and the stupid smelly bus
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Chapter 3: The Stupid Smelly Bus The bus wasn't like my daddy's car at all. It was very big inside. And the seats didn't have any cloth on them. The little curly girl was sitting near the front. And so I  tapped on her. "Guess what?" I said. "Mother said for me to sit here." "No!" she said. "I'm saving this seat for my best friend, Mary Ruth Marble!" Then she put her little white purse on the place where I was going to sit. And so I made a face at her. "Hurry up and find a seat, young lady," said Mr. Woo. And so I quick sat down across from the curly mean girl. And Mr. Woo shut the door. It wasn't a regular kind of door, though. It folded in half. And when it closed, it made a whishy sound. I don't like that kind of door. If it closes on you by accident, it will cut you in half, and you will make a squishy sound. The bus made a big roar. Then a big puff of black smelly smoke came out the back end of it. It's called bus breath, I think. Mr. Woo drove for a while. Then the brakes made that loud, screechy noise again. I covered my ears so it couldn't get inside my head. 'Cause if loud, screechy noises get inside your head, you have to take an aspirin. I saw that on a TV commercial. Then the bus door opened again. And a dad and a boy with a grouchy face got on. The dad smiled. Then he plopped the grouchy boy right next to me. "This is Jim," he said. "I'm afraid Jim isn't too happy this afternoon." The dad kissed the boy good-bye. But the boy wiped it off his cheek. Jim had on a backpack. It was blue. I love backpacks. I wish I had one of my very own. One time I found a red one in a trash can. But it had a little bit of gushy on it, and Mother said no. Jim's backpack had lots of zippers. I touched each one of them. "One... two... three... four," I counted. Then I unzipped one. "HEY! DON'T!" yelled Jim. He zipped it right up again. Then he moved to the seat in front of me. I hate that Jim. After that, the bus kept stopping and starting. And lots of kids kept getting on. Loud kids. And some of them were the kind who look like meanies. Then the bus began getting very noisy and hot inside. And the sun kept shining down on me and my fuzzy hot sweater. And here's another hot thing. I couldn't roll down my window because it didn't have a handle. And so I just kept on getting hotter and hotter. And it smelled in the bus, too. The bus smelled like an egg salad sandwich. "I want to get off of here," I said right out loud. But nobody heard me. "I hate it in this stupid smelly bus." Then my eyes got a little bit wet. I wasn't crying, though. 'Cause I'm not a baby, that's why. After that, my nose started running. Only the bus didn't have a glove compartment. Which is where you keep the travel tissues, of course. And so I had to wipe my nose on my fuzzy pink sweater sleeve. Then I stayed on the bus for about an hour or three. Until finally I saw a flagpole and a playground. That meant we were at kindergarten! Then Mr. Woo drove the bus into the parking lot and stopped. I jumped up very fast. 'Cause all I wanted to do was get off that stupid smelly thing! Only guess what? That Jim pushed right in front of me. And the curly mean girl did, too. And then people started squishing me real tight. And so I pushed them away. And they pushed me right back. That's when I fell down! And a big foot stepped on my skirt that looks like velvet. "STOP IT!" I yelled. Then Mr. Woo hollered, "HEY, HEY, HEY!" And he picked me up. And helped me off the bus. Mrs. was waiting for me just like my mother said. "Hi! I'm glad to see you!" she called. Then I ran over to her. And I showed her the big footprint on my skirt that looks like velvet. "Yeah, only look what happened. I got stepped on and so now I'm soiled." Mrs. brushed it. "Don't worry, Junie," she said. "It'll come off." After that I just folded my arms and made a frown. 'Cause guess what? She forgot my B. again. Excerpted from Junie B. Jones and the Stupid Smelly Bus by Barbara Park All rights reserved by the original copyright owners. Excerpts are provided for display purposes only and may not be reproduced, reprinted or distributed without the written permission of the publisher.
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  Publishers Weekly Review

One of the initial titles released under the First Stepping Stone imprint, chapter books aimed at newly independent readers and arranged in series, Park's ( Skinnybones ) jolly caper is the first installment to feature Junie B., a feisty almost-six-year-old who is not at all happy about riding the bus on the first day of kindergarten. In fact, she doesn't like a single thing about this vehicle: not the kids who get on it (``Loud kids. And some of them were the kind who look like meanies''); not the door (``If it closes on you by accident, it will cut you in half, and you will make a squishy sound''); and not the black smoke it emits (``It's called bus breath, I think''). Other equally candid, on-target perceptions fill Junie B.'s first-person narrative, which is peppered with reader-involving questions (``Only guess what?''; `` 'Cause guess why?'') that help to propel the story at a whiz-bang pace. When a classmate tells Junie B. that kids will pour chocolate milk on her head on the way home, the spunky child finds a way to avoid the dreaded bus. Park convinces beginning readers that Junie B.-- and reading--are lots of fun. Ages 6-9. (Aug.) (c) Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved

  School Library Journal Review

K-Gr 3 --Park is truly a funny writer. Although Junie B. is a kindergartner, she's sure to make middle graders laugh out loud when they read about her adventures on the first day of school. Even the most insecure readers will feel superior because they know so much more than she does. Brunkus's occasional black-and-white pencil illustrations are appealing and reinforce the mood of the text. Junie B. is a real character; she talks a lot, is funny without knowing it, and honest to a fault. This book will get lots of peer recommendations, and younger kids will enjoy listening to it when read aloud. It's a real hoot! --Gale W. Sherman, Pocatello Pub . Lib . , ID (c) Copyright 2010. Library Journals LLC, a wholly owned subsidiary of Media Source, Inc. No redistribution permitted.
"Hilarious. Barbara Park makes reading fun." --Dav Pilkey, author of Dog Man <br> <br> Barbara Park's #1 New York Times bestselling chapter book series, Junie B. Jones, has been keeping kids laughing--and reading--for more than twenty-five years. Over 65 million copies sold! <br> <br> Meet the World's Funniest Kindergartner--Junie B. Jones! Remember when it was scary to go to school? In the first Junie B. Jones book, it's Junie B.'s first day and she doesn't know anything. She's so scared of the school bus and the meanies on it that when it's time to go home, she doesn't.<br> <br> USA Today :<br> "Junie B. is the darling of the young-reader set."<br> <br> Publishers Weekly :<br> "Park convinces beginning readers that Junie B.--and reading--are lots of fun."<br> <br> Kirkus Reviews :<br> "Junie's swarms of young fans will continue to delight in her unique take on the world. . . . A hilarious, first-rate read-aloud."<br> <br> Time :<br> "Junie B. Jones is a feisty six-year-old with an endearing penchant for honesty."
Table of Contents
1.Meeting Mrs.p. 1
2.Feeling Squeezyp. 9
3.The Stupid Smelly Busp. 13
4.Me and Lucille and Some Other Kidsp. 21
5.Principalp. 30
6.A Good Hiderp. 36
7.Peeky Holes and Spyingp. 43
8.The Dangerous Nurse's Officep. 49
9.Zooming Speedy Fastp. 56
10.Me and That Gracep. 63
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